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Cold Dead Fish - The Company
Cold Dead Fish Incorporated is a company with an unmatched vision for the future. Our ideas represent a radical shift in the current thinking of the people of this planet and as such they often scare those people unfamiliar with our founder, El Presidente. We are not here to make you feel good about yourself or save the whales. We do not donate money to the local children's hospital. We have no interest in helping the homeless and we are not concerned about so-called global warming.
Our goal is simple: Keep our goals as vague as possible.
There are those in today's world of political correctness and corporate accountability who have chosen to shun the harsh realities of life in favor of sugar-coated lies. They hide behind a smoke screen of high-priced lawyers and marketing babble that leaves the consumer confused about the products and the companies that produce them. We are not like that. We make products that - when used correctly - are designed to cause serious bodily harm to stupid people. Only stupid people need fear Cold Dead Fish Incorporated.
As the world spins inexorably around on its slightly tilted axis, CDF will continue to provide intelligent people with inspired products
in the hope that they may rid themselves of the ugliness that is all around them
via small bursts of dangerous electrical energy.
Viva El Presidente!
